Notices by mason (sweetmercury@jorts.horse)

One of the (many) reasons I like the Fedi is that it’s the only place on line that isn’t a fever dream of algorithmically driven content designed to confuse me into clicking an ad.

*David Attenborough hides in a bush, watching me take out my phone and start scrolling the timeline*

“Here we see the extremely rare Mastodon heterosexual. Like many before him, he’s wandered into a harsh environment to which his kind are ill suited, he must adapt quickly, or risk defederation. He’s cautious, he begins to type his first post, a reply to a woman with “men stay away’ in her bio: ‘Has anyone told you how beautiful you are when you smile?’ Oh, dear.”

@mal @ItsJenNotGabby @mirzaba @taweret the Fediverse politely discusses Eva but tears itself apart over apple discourse.

AW LAWD HE COMIN