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Just now realizing that I actually had stuff scheduled today, that I was dragged into, and don't have the guts to cancel.
Today is gonna be hell on anxiety.
Neighbor of mine who clearly feels an almost condescending amount of pity on me. Invited me out since it's near Christmas, to 'go to a Cafe' so I awkwardly agreed to that.
My extended family, all of who I barely know, also are just now trying to 'reconnect' with me, since, yknow, I don't talk to my parents at all, for reasons obvious to those who know me, and they feel a bit sorry for me. Arguably too little too late, but it's a token effort that I feel bad not going to. So they invited me out to a 'family Christmas restaurant gathering'
Neither of these events I really -want- to go to, I just...feel I'm socially meant to, and with anxiety, I don't really have enough social sense to know whether that's right or not.
Fun fun fun. So help me god.
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@katiekats Hopefully it won't be too bad. Not everyone is evil.
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@bob
Indeed. I doubt the intentions of them, but...that may be my own worry and paranoia, sorta the main issue with that, never know whether you're right or wrong on a feeling.
Thanks for the vote of confidence however, I do hope it goes okay.
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hurting cos, locked up, struggling with it, not sure how said people will react to that, they're aware of it tho, i think
gonna go back in, can tell, tensing hasnt loosened enough
just trying to push enough to make this post, and promise my @maiyannah i'll be with her as soon as i can fight this off, cos i love ya liz
PlatinumKatie
Bob Mottram
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