A story set in The Anarcho-Capitalist States of America

Location: Kellogg's Hospital
*A man bursts into the ER doors*
Man: "Help! I've been shot!"
Receptionist: "What's your name, sir?"
Man: "J-John... John Nestle(tm) Smith"
Receptionist: "It says here you're on the McDonalds Dollar Menu Healthcare Plan. For a gunshot meal with a side of organ failure, we can give you a tampon for each exit wound. Please come again!"