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1. PlatinumKatie (katiekats@community.highlandarrow.com)'s status on Saturday, 26-May-2018 10:55:35 EDT PlatinumKatie
   I'm quite emotionally immature in a lot of ways due to what I've faced in my life, and, suppose that's sort of silly. 
   
   Some people face deeply tough times and come out more mature, they've seen the worst, they're stronger now. Maybe more cynical or something at most, but they've learned a lot in those years.
   
   Others...just kinda break and then don't know how to deal with anything. They've seen the worst and the worst destroyed them, and now they make lots of mistakes, and don't know how to manage anything. They learned precisely fuck all in those years out of fear, and now they're thrust into life while having never truly grown up and discovered important lessons.
   
   Unforunately, I'm the latter camp.
   1. PlatinumKatie (katiekats@community.highlandarrow.com)'s status on Saturday, 26-May-2018 11:01:01 EDT PlatinumKatie

      in reply to
      I still react awfully to extreme emotions and don't know how to handle them.
      
      I still break down crying at the slightest thing.
      
      I still desperately look for hope and goodness in others even when it totally fucks me or others over, because I don't want anyone to repeat the cruelty I've seen.
      
      I still push away though who care for me because I don't believe I deserve their emotions.
      
      I still every single moment want to run and hide and never come up because actually living when it feels like I should have died years ago, is terrifying.  
      
      These things ain't excuses and I don't deserve pity for them. They're just me, and I, apologize for those who deal with that.