@mooshoe we've always been with Masto.host. It was a conscious decision when I first started, as I've run projects before and the admin work just saps the fun out of it. This way, I can enjoy the community and the awesome @hugo does all the clever stuff.
Federation with other instances just takes time as your users start to follow people. If you don't have many users, you could consider implementing a follow not, but they're a double edged sword as many don't like them.