I have been on the Fediverse a good long while. Probably coming up on two years. I remember when Mastodon didn't have CW's. I remember when it didn't have private posts. I remember when Mastodon was made for tech bros, not for minorities. We were a peripherial demographic once upon a time, not the main demographic.

I am agender. I am trans. I am autistic. I'm other things, but those are the biggest three things that define who/what I am. I outlined some other things I am and am not above, so this gives context to my experience. (Before you open your mouth and say or think it, no, I did not come from Tumblr, and in fact, I don't even like Tumblr culture. I actually hate it because it's like the worst parts of the Fediverse concentrated into one place. And no, my gender is not autism.)

The Fediverse has not always been a safe place for me. I have been trolled, harassed, and I've even had outright lies told about me by someone from my past. Which for some reason people actually believe, even though the person in question is a well-known liar and dogpiler. Some of the slip-ups are my fault. I gave the wrong impression or tooted late-nite or under the influence of alcohol when I shouldn't have. Others were not warranted.

I was once told by Alda of witches.town (now gone) that I should jump into traffic. This was shortly before a friend of mine did just that. A friend of mine who left that instance because of that.

I have been dogpiled for not being the right kind of leftist. I've had people try to troll me. I've had times where I've had to step away, for something I thought wouldn't be a hot take. I do not feel safe expressing many sensible and well-intentioned views on the Fediverse, or discussing certain societal problems.

I feel like the fact I participate in the political process and that I'm left of the Berniecrats (and being someone who prefers to work at the ballot box and not with a Molotov cocktail) gets me largely ignored by the Masto political crowd. I'm just not the right kind of leftist. And it's not like the ancaps are gonna like me either. I don't know what it is about the Fediverse, but it attracts political radicals of the intolerant kind.

So yeah, I would not say Masto has been safe for me. I've seen it all. A major part of this is being an admin, and being on the front lines of this stuff, but I am sure ordinary users see it too.

So why do I stay?

Because it's still miles ahead of everything else.

I felt even less safe on Twitter. I definitely do not feel camaraderie or safety on somewhere like Tumblr. I barely venture outside a couple IRC channels. When you're someone like me, you will always be a square peg in a round hole, struggling through life, fucking things up cause you're human, and that includes the flaws.

I still have fun here. But I won't pretend it's been a smooth ride. And I won't abide people claiming it will always be a smooth ride for them either. I know people who've been run off here for transgressions way less bad than mine.