I don't know why, but particle physics feels fake. Discussing interactions between quarks and muons feels a bit like discussing how many fairies can dance on the head of a pin. The standard model has the feel of astrology or alchemy to it, with its charts and baroque rules. String theory and branes? How much LSD did they take? I mean, I'm sure it's all correct. It's just that I can't feel convinced, because I can't make sense of it, and it all sounds a bit contrived.