some nights i cant stand the idea of going to sleep because its like, well, ummm, well you feel a sense of finality about the day and ummmm, well, ummm, hard to uhhhh, hard to explain the feeling umm, i guess, well actually i guess, its like, well, its like you die, isnt it??? its the same as dying. just because its not permanent doesnt mean its not scary. if only i could phrase this in a way that didnt sound extremely stupid