- I'm not letting you enter the backstage area.
- Why not? Here's my press card. Let me in!
- Not with that equipment, you aren't.
- What do you mean?
- An iPhone and a Bluetooth mic? Come ooon...
- Look, this microphone has a better frequency response and SNR than a Neumann U87. Let me in!
- Let me see that Bode plot. *squints at paper and turns it*
- Well?
- All right, it checks out. I'll let you in, but next time, mount it on something heavy.