I hate what's happening to Sam Neill, but I love how he's taking it. My parents have been the same way with their cancers. (they're currently doing ok, we're ok)
I try to do the same thing in life: Do what you can to handle it and if you feel you're doing what you can, keep doing that and let it go unless anything changes.
Sometimes things get to you, but when it works it works. It's a goal.