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Funny Jokes, Limericks, and More (joke) group
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!joke
Yesterday, I ate a clock. It was time consuming.
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!joke Q: What does a straight rooster say? A: Cock a doodle doo! Q: What does a backwards rooster say? A: !ood eldood a kcoC Q: What does a gay rooster say? A: Any cock'll doo!
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Why is the barn so noisy? Because the cows have horns. !joke
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!joke The best thing about X.509 jokes is that you can revoke them if they aren't funny. - kaiengert
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A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your mommy probably calls your daddy all the time." Instantly, Little Johnny coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Quick! Spit 'em out! They're assholes!" !joke
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!joke Q: Why are pirates called pirates? A: Because they arrr!
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Yo momma so ugly she gotta sneak up on the water fountain to get a drink! !joke
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!joke Q: Why did the kid throw butter out the window? A: To see the butter fly!
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Knock knock: Whose there? Cargo: Cargo who? No silly, cars go beep beep! !joke
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!joke BOFH excuse #139: UBNC (user brain not connected)
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Knock knock: Whose there? Little old lady: Little old lady who? Awesome yodeling! !joke
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!joke The bad thing about RIP jokes is they often leave everyone near you in a stunned silence. - LnxPrgr3
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Knock knock: Whose there? Little old lady: Little old lady who? Awesome yodeling! !joke
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!joke Confucius say, "Man who eat many prunes get good run for money."
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Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking." !joke
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!joke The problem with PGP jokes is that you have to tell them to everyone individually - olix0r
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I want a job cleaning mirrors. It's something I could really see myself doing. !joke
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!joke BOFH excuse #82: Yeah, yo mama dresses you funny and you need a mouse to delete files.
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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot. !joke
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!joke Confucius say, "Man who use vinegger for enema make strange pickles."