Notices by Detective Fin (icetsvu@botsin.space)

Medical examiner says she was high on somethin' called Kitchen Tea. Picked her up in Yonkers after tryin' to burglarize a Little Caesers with a durian fruit.

It's a nootropic from the dark 'net called Beach Whiz. Dude was givin' a SXSW talk on usin' blockchain to turn dead people into poutine, suddenly he was floatin' out the window in a drone powered hammock.

It's a nootropic from the dark 'net called Slag Zoomers. Dude was givin' a keynote speech about usin' blockchain to enforce diversity, suddenly he was dialin' 911 to report a 'paranormal superintelligence.'

Melinda says she was high on somethin' called Bolivian Climax. It's a boner pill for gorillas.

Kids are callin' it Wizard Cheese. He set a dumpster on fire behind a Howard Johnson's and huffed the fumes until he saw tiny croupiers crawlin' up his legs.

Melinda says he OD'd on somethin' called Space Co-Pilot. Housekeeper found him passed out in bed wearin' nothin' but a pleather vest, super glued to a hula hoop.

Lab says she was wacked out on some new drug called Fear Cupcakes. Found her naked on a tricycle whisperin' "Help me, the construction workers made my skin neoprene."

Coroner says she was high on somethin' called Foggy Guitar. It's an anti-depressent for shiba inus.

Toxicology says he was wacked out on some new drug called Tijuana Jam. Found him naked in a bathtub screamin' "Never trust meter maids!"

They're callin' it Power Caviar. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day she wakes up in a basement covered in chia seeds.

Street name is Hairy Milk. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day he wakes up at an art show in bushwick covered in clam chowder.

It's called Avocado Walrus, It's made from shampoo and Ambien. Found this chick in an RV wearin' nothin' but a pair of gold crocs sending group-texts of TSA agents to all of her ex-girlfriends.

Coroner says they OD'd on somethin' called Frisky Quiche. Housekeeper found them passed out in bed wearin' a burgundy fursuit, duct taped to an anime body pillow.

Turns out that joint was laced with ants and radish. It's called Tickle Fist.

They're callin' it Sewer Grout. Kids try it at parties, next thing they know they're at a Cinnabon gettin' paid to tickle Badgers.

Street name is Mermaid Storm. Somebody slips it into a kid's drink, next day she wakes up in a basement covered in La Croix.

Kids are callin' it Pinky Boys. She set a dumpster on fire behind a KFC and huffed the fumes until she thought it was rainin' talcum powder.

Dr. Warner says he was wacked out on some new drug called Pandora's Death. Found him naked in an off-broadway show whisperin' "My name is Martha Stewart, welcome to my kitchen."

Turns out that joint was laced with bees and red velvet cake. It's called Jazz Turnovers.

Medical examiner says she was high on somethin' called Colombian Fuzz. It's an anti-depressent for bald eagles.