Notices by Sam the Octopus (troublemoney@computerfairi.es), page 4

just saw no less than two people up the supermarket wearing their mask with their noses out

they annoyed me far more than all the people not wearing masks at all (it's not compulsory here yet)

like, fine, if you don't wear a mask you're a twat

but wearing a mask wrong? that's just half-arsing it and that I CAN NOT ABIDE DO IT PROPERLY OR NOT AT ALL YOU AGE'D FUCK

@stolas topologically speaking, humans are also a torus

@tan ah, thymelords

oh, everyone remember to order in some rum, it's the 50th anniversary of black tot day next week

(the Royal Navy issued all sailors a daily rum ration up until the 31st of July 1970, the rum ration was called a "tot", and the day of the final rum ration was called "Black Tot Day")

dessert mustard

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTIdjXVYTIk

1: bikini bottom is at the bottom of the ocean

2: bikini bottom appears to have most if not all the properties of a nation

therefore the "deep state" is bikini bottom

@joshua space winnebago

@stolas just like *prod*

@Jo @ThreeLetterMax @stolas well, it is the one thing we're known for these days

@stolas @Jo and Tim Martin needs to be trebuchet'd into the sun

if the apple thing for your wrist is a watch then an iphone is a pocketwatch

felix (one of our fully grown and not at all small cats) was sitting down on the path

a hedgehog wandered up to him

felix then proceeded to run away as quickly as his little legs could carry him

the hedgehog looked confused for a second and continued to trundle along

@mavica virtual potato

@mavica video... potato?

@mavica I'm not entirely sure what a vtuber is, but let's say yes

pro cooking tip: when a recipe calls for "mace" they mean the spice made from the seed covering of nutmeg, not tear gas

did someone bookmark my toot about sped up moon landing footage being brilliant and boost it today for the anniversary of apollo 11 or did it just resurface naturally?

@stolas is it an exterminatus when you flip the board after the inevitable rage-quit?

let me get this straight, a bunch of baby witches decided to try to put a hex on the moon

but before that, they had the great idea of TRYING TO PUT A HEX ON THE FAE?!

THE ENTITIES WITH CENTURIES OF FOLKLORE DETAILING PRECISELY WHY ONE SHOULD NOT FUCK WITH THEM?!

I'M ENTIRELY AGNOSTIC ABOUT THE IDEA OF MAGIC AND THE EXISTENCE OF THE FAE AND EVEN I THINK THAT'S A FUCKING TERRIBLE IDEA

@mavica pain to code with, always end up with race conditions