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Notices by Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club), page 20
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@phildobangnz Again, I'm not convinced that people do listen to their feelings faithfully. If they do, we wouldn't nearly have as many self-destructive situations. It's more like it gets buried but builds up until it gets so worse that they explode from it. Also, it can help with creating goals... or with simply learning to say no to a commitment. With knowing your limits. Emotions are a guide for your current well-being. It can tell you if you are taking on too much or not.
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@phildobangnz And by that, I mean that cheating seems more deliberate than a mistake.
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@phildobangnz In a lot of cases, the problem occurs when women aren't following their feelings. When they shun them, ignore them. They aren't being assertive. Whatever we decide, we must live with the consequences. Then try to learn from the mistakes and poor decisions so those can be prevented. Although it is hard to think of actively cheating as a mistake...
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@phildobangnz Aaahh. I see. I don't know much about it, tbh!
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@phildobangnz Yeah. In your case, I think it would be better to stop making jokes at your expense due to how low self-esteem you have. It gets warped due to that. It would be better to focus on improving your self-esteem. Once you feel more comfortable with yourself, have improved self-esteem... then it probably won't come across so badly. You won't be shitting on yourself further then. I'm not into put-downs.
It can be difficult to navigate how you feel about dancing and how you come across. But doing something like this can improve your confidence. It takes practice, and with that comes the knowledge you can do it. That you are capable. Which is a good morale boost. It doesn't have to be dancing, but you might benefit from it. It's quite easy to practice dancing at home, and then later moving onto having a partner to dance with if that takes your fancy. Something like cooking can be a morale boost, to teach you how to improvise and that making mistakes is okay. I'm still learning this. It's hard to let go of feeling bad about mistakes!
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@phildobangnz You shouldn't ignore your emotions. It is detrimental because they will find another release if you do. They can be useful even when making decisions, because sometimes you intuitively know what you want and that can be a guide to figuring out what you want with reason. It can show what you want, and then you can set a goal to achieve it.
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@phildobangnz I wonder if surviving the death march gave him some skills in resilience. He got through it, and may have used it to keep going. Like near death experiences or being told you'll die early can motivate people to live for as long as they can.
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@phildobangnz What I mean is, cheating has no place. Sometimes we can't help fantasies but they are things that shouldn't be acted upon. And sometimes they are things you wouldn't actually want to happen... so be careful what you wish for and all that.
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@phildobangnz Yeah. At the end of the day, it depends on what your priorities in life are. I wouldn't put it past lots of women to fantasize about or deciding to cheat with that one person they really like. But it has no place in a marriage or otherwise committed relationship. Lacking consequences is not an acceptable excuse.
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@phildobangnz It's not too late to try, and have a laugh as you go. Which is also endearing and fun! There is definitely something to humour being attractive, and it can show that you are comfortable with yourself... with making mistakes. Depending on how it is done. Making too many jokes at your own expense isn't all that attractive, but perhaps being able to laugh about mistakes is.
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@phildobangnz Hmm. I think it is important for us all to find a balance. It is important to listen to what our emotions/intuition has to say, but not to let it rule us. It needs to be tempered by reason just as you could say that reason needs to be tempered by intuition. Find a balance that means you are listening to yourself, that you can be calm when you make life-changing decisions. All too often, anxiety makes us believe that we need to make a decision right on the spot as we panic. But that isn't the case often. Taking a step back to think it through helps before moving forwards.
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@phildobangnz Hmm... interesting. Diet probably does play a role, I think it is what gives us more energy and stamina from what I'm reading.
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@phildobangnz Thank you. I think it is quite idealistic in the context of modern society. But I do hope to make it work, and to pull my weight where I can. I do make an exception when it comes to divorce though, if I am really being abused then I will have to cut ties.
Yeah, I think that we've discussed this part before. I tend to look for what is fair and go with that. I don't like being unfair. Perhaps to a fault. Yep, I will not be holding my breath! Not gonna let them kill me off sooner. :P (Now, my depression might be a different story...)
I'm not sure. It probably does work to my advantage... but I do need to be cautious. I'm not interested in men who will try to game me. Another reason to create a more stable boundary between me and them. I'm not interested in a open relationship, in one night stands, short-term relationships, etc. Or even in cheating as you say. If I were that way inclined, I think that I would have been sleeping around or had sex with more partners than I have. Also, I don't believe in cheating as you've mentioned. I don't see the point in it. I know it is hard, but it is better to talk to your partner about addressing emotional/sexual intimacy assertively... and if that can't be achieved then leave the relationship. No point in marriage or having children if you want to sleep around. I'm more interested in becoming a mother, but I also want a healthy relationship... to have an active father for my children. It helps their development. I suppose mine too.
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@phildobangnz @1iceloops123 Well, I meant that being stuck up doesn't mean they aren't using their brains. So if you want them to stop being stuck up, then it will take more than using their brains as you've shown. :')
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@phildobangnz Haha... impress with those moves! :')
I guess that solves the familial angle in some ways. Haha.
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@phildobangnz That sucks that his fall made everything worse and that he is so weak now. But to be able to be bouncing around at 80-90... life goals, amirite?
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@why @1iceloops123 It also looks good on them if they can say that you've graduated with good grades and gone on to find a job which pays them back. But yes, I don't think this translates well in the workplace.
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@phildobangnz Well, I have to admit that I cannot argue with anything you are saying here. I think that men should be able to say no to paternity. It's not fair to force fatherhood onto them, just because the child views them as their father too. It should be a choice. I do share your concern about whether it will be addressed in our lifetime given how it gets treated.
I dread to think about what my generation will be like in divorce rates. I just hope that I don't become that statistic. Perhaps I'm very idealistic in this regard.
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@1iceloops123 Yeah. It looks bad on them if it seems people aren't passing with good grades.
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@1iceloops123 Is this where your score is dragged down if you get a d anywhere?
Sim Bot
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