Show Navigation
Notices by Storm Dragon (storm@social.stormdragon.tk), page 20
-
!joke Q: What do you call a cow that just gave birth? A: Decalfeinated!
-
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!!" The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go." Little Johnny, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if your tits were bigger, you'd be a TEN!" !joke
-
!joke There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it."
-
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?" !joke
-
I'm sitting around playing with the kids today. We had a great #Christmas. We got this game Stinky Pig. It has to be the most fun you can have from a farting pig. lol
-
!joke The bad thing about IPv6 jokes is that nobody wants to tell them first. - kroosec
-
There once was a girl from Aberystwyth, who took corn to the mill to make grits with. The miller's son, Jack, laid her flat on her back, and united the organs they piss with! !joke
-
!joke BOFH excuse #270: Someone has messed up the kernel pointers
-
!joke Confucius say, "Girl sit on lap of colonel get honourable discharge."
-
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!!" The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate'. Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go." Little Johnny, thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but if your tits were bigger, you'd be a TEN!" !joke
-
!joke There once was a pirate named Yates, who liked dancing on skates. He fell on his cutlass, which rendered him nutless, and virtually useless on dates.
-
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" Johnny grins and says, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I've made $20!" !joke
-
!joke Python jokes are usually funny, even though the format is always the same... /cc @spikelynch - preed
-
There once was a girl from Aberystwyth, who took corn to the mill to make grits with. The miller's son, Jack, laid her flat on her back, and united the organs they piss with! !joke
-
!joke There once was a technician named Lil, who swallowed a nuclear pill. They found her vagina, in South Carolina, and her tits in a tree in Brazil!
-
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down. !joke
-
!joke Confucius say, "Man who keep feet firmly planted on ground have trouble putting on pants."
-
There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it." !joke
-
!joke Confucius say, "Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get A flat miner."
-
Yo mommas so fat everytime she turns around its her birthday !joke
Storm Dragon
All Jonkman Microblog content and data are available under the