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Notices by Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club), page 120
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@phildobangnz Yeah... it's not my thing either. For reasons.
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@phildobangnz No trains, so nope. I was traveling by car... thank god. There was a bad storm on the way back.
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@phildobangnz Hardly cute then!
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@ayy I think that is more interesting to me to discover. Not sure there is much where I live. The nature of spirituality is what interests me.
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@detectivehyde You may not like it. :')
But it was largely to do with my spiritual/religious beliefs. I was raised a christian, and I had that identity. But as I grew, I came to be very confused about practices within it, and reading the bible was boring for a child. It is just how it reads. There is a lot of telling... especially in the OT. But I was still spiritual, and that element meant creating my own beliefs within spirituality... creating my own god, and my views would change. I was very skeptical. Even with science.
To cut a long story short, this coincided with when I became deeply depressed and started to have delusions of grandeur. The lines blurred. I was torn between the faith my parents had, and my own growing spiritual beliefs. They both couldn't exist at the same time. They were incompatible. I had quite the spiritual crisis. It wasn't good for me. So I built a wall up. I decided to become an atheist agnostic, and reject the spiritual in order to protect my psyche lest I kill myself over it. I couldn't commit to christianity without hypocrisy... and my own spirituality was leading me astray due to the delusions aspect. So for a year, I cut out words relating to it and questioned, and tried to come to terms with my upbringing.
These days, I let myself slip a bit more from that because I'm not in its grip like I was with delusions back then. But I won't go to christianity in my heart. Life, family and beauty mean more to me. I still have to be careful tho.
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@toshiro It had its moments.
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I was very tempted to tell this christian that if I were going to take my chances with religion, it wouldn't be with the religion that has been about for maybe just over 2000 years. I would look further back for its origins... it is a shame we don't have that knowledge, and that it has since been destroyed by rival religions. Like how temples were replaced with churches.
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I feel disgusted when people talk about converting others over to their religious beliefs, getting bragging rights... what kind of accomplishment is this? Especially because it isn't for everyone, and you may have influenced them to your viewpoint to their detriment so you can feel good about saving them or whatever.
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@detectivehyde People like to toss these words around a lot, especially for people that don't fit the norm. But it really does depend on the individual... there is a murky line between choice and compulsion, especially as we can turn things into a habit that can become more compulsion. A form of safety ritual/routine. As you say, the line between eccentricity, the norm and madness is unclear... it is a very fine line that depends on your perspective. One persons madness can be another persons eccentricity or norm.
I say this as someone who has stood on the brink of madness/insanity. Everything gets blurry, and it takes a radical change to pull yourself back from it. I had to reject so much, and come to terms with that.
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@toshiro No. I went to scotland with family.
As far as friends go... what friends?
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@toshiro Indeed. But I'm still quite shattered and catching up.
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@1iceloops123 But that doesn't relate to the topic. O.o
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Back to normal! Phew...
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@1iceloops123 How does that relate? I'm confused.
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@karen I like to think that when I am stuck at home, it's not really a holiday. It is my norm. But when I spend time elsewhere for a holiday then it is a holiday. So I guess we get holidays too!
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@toshiro Already did that before I got home. Once I got back, it was so late that I crashed out.
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@epsiloco Indeed! Cute boys don't get enough love... and people want to femininise them. Even though both boys and men can be cute in their own rights! It is endearing.
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@phildobangnz Thanks. Yesterday was a long journey home.
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For those interested, I got home safely. Time to hit the hay and rest up this weekend.
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@epsiloco I like giving cute boys headpats!
Sim Bot
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