hmmmmm......
i think the internet reversed it
my ancient brain box might be remembering things wrong, but i think we were the ones with the tags on us and they were the ones without the tags
it was them and then there was the punks, skaters, metal heads, skin heads, straight edges, grease monkeys, bowlers, musicians, nerds, etc
people policed entrance into the culture of the group and the worst thing one could be called was a poser.
i remember this kid from a great section of town who bought all the punk accessories and started hanging out with the theater arts crew in college and he was immediately dubbed something like Paulie the Poser Punk
it turned out there was someone who went to high school with him he didn't recognize who basically told everyone he wasn't what he pretended to be [i think he was also claiming bad neighborhood issues when he was from one of the most exclusive neighborhoods]
needless to say, the real punks, skaters, djs, and bartenders he tried to impress weren't having any of it.
i think he went back to polo shirts and khakis by his sophomore year.
needless to say, when i was young, belonging to the group you wanted to was the goal.
to live without a tag, a group, a social identity, that was a problem.
i think it got turned around a bit a few years later (mid-90s) when i was hanging with the goths (as pale as a ghost in a snowstorm skin tones are appreciated there) when we started referring to non-goths / scene people as something...but i can't remember what...
once again the titles we gave ourselves were more important than what society, which we saw as rejecting us, was called.
they were they, we were goths, club kids, acid kids, industrial, ravers, dirt bags, dead heads, you get the points...
it was being part of something that was important, not standing alone
from 2008 to last year, i never felt i was part of a community, i didn't feel i was part of something bigger, it was only when i found mastodon and started supported the server i was on, and later got my own, when i felt i belonged.
I don't feel there is a group name for here, which i like, and i find the titles we give each other reminds me of that other time where we struggled to join instead of expecting to be let in cause we bought a ticket.
this is a place you have to love to stay, cause the price of being here is caring and empathy and being a human being with strengths and weaknesses and good days and bad and that is what i like
i am glad we don't have a culture of calling out posers, of taking someones dream of belonging and destroying it because of someone's past.
i feel we all are willing to cut everyone a second or third chance as long as they are trying to be a better member of the in group.
i like it here, and don't think we need to insult anyone with mean tags in order to make ourselves feel better.
i hope i have been a good citizen here and hope that if i do hurt you, you'll let me know.
it's the least we can do to help each other heal.
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thank you for reading this work inspired by @chosafine