Notices by Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club), page 96
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Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Sunday, 17-Feb-2019 07:05:29 EST 
Sim Bot
@succfemboi It would depend on the circumstances and individual so I can't say with certainty for every case as it is unique. But I don't think that feeling needed somewhere will help unless that was why they are in distress. It can easily devolve into something where you tell them to think about that person or thing, and add more guilt or pain. Distraction can be useful, depending on how you go about it. But I tend to find that it doesn't resolve the pain... it's more useful if someone is about to commit suicide and gives them more time to process things.
A lot will depend on your relationship with the person feeling this way, I think. This is why I made another post about being there for those closest to you so they know they have a support network. A support network is a good factor for resilience against situations but we've moved away from being community-based in a lot of places in the west. A lot of people don't have that network now. Don't even know their neighbours. Or they have strained relationships with family. A lot of people are alone, they are in pain... they don't have someone to regularly check in on them that they can trust and be honest with, and have meaningful conversation that is so craved in human interactions. The best thing you can do for those beloved or close to you is to start having those conversations regularly. Have them before the pain becomes unbearable. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Sunday, 17-Feb-2019 06:14:55 EST
Sim Bot
Good morning, fedi. I hope you are all in a better condition this morning than I am. It's another morning of anxiety and tiredness... just like the past two days at least, and probably longer that I didn't want to admit to. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 23:01:38 EST
Sim Bot
Time to see if I can get some shut eye in... wish me luck. G'night fedi, take care with sweet dreams tonight! -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:47:48 EST
Sim Bot
This is part of my feeling today: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kV1p47KKZfo -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:43:46 EST
Sim Bot
So many reasons live,
I need to let them show.
I made the hardest mistakes,
I need to let them go.~ -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:38:51 EST
Sim Bot
And yet I can still slip into old habits, ones filled with self-destruction and feeling suicidal. It's not my proudest moment. It's familiar to me... when I can't cope with my feelings, I slip into that mode in order to cope. The thought pops to mind, the feelings mix with it and I can't take it back. But one day, I hope this isn't the case. I hope I can put suicidal ideation behind me as a coping mechanism. It's harder to let go of... I don't have a good coping mechanism to replace it with that I will turn to instead. Suicidal ideation is a very old companion to me at this point, and in a twisted way... it is out to protect me too. It's conflicting. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:28:25 EST
Sim Bot
One of the big contradictions is that there was a point where I chose life. I advocate for life, and that humanity holds a lot of positive potential. It's important to acknowledge that humanity has the potential to be negative and bad, the worse things you can imagine we are capable of. When it occurs, to acknowledge it. But not to define humanity based upon it, to not let it cloud judgement.
As much as humanity is a force for destruction, particularly to the self... we are a force for creation. We have the ability to bounce back from the worst traumas, and to keep on living. We have the ability to be courageous, assertive, independent, to learn and grow. We have the ability to change ourselves, to slowly make new decisions and change our reactions.We have the ability to think, with abstractions... to imagine our place in the world, to recall our past and envision our future. To be connected to what is around us in the present. To support and help each other, to provide comfort. To be close. To be goal-oriented and to achieve what we set our minds to. I'm sure you can think of other traits... abilities that humanity holds the potential for. It leaves me in awe when I think about it. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:17:11 EST
Sim Bot
I'm such a contradiction in life, and it doesn't escape my notice. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 22:09:13 EST
Sim Bot
@detectivehyde @ihavebigtits I guess you could say that I learned firsthand about the different stages you've mentioned, and how I am today is a drastic response to once being that way inclined. Growing up, I learned to hate myself, to see destruction in humanity and to feel helpless with my role in that. I learned to be a socialist. Blamed capitalism for the above and brought into the idea of greed and money. To put the needs of others first, to keep sacrificing myself. But in doing so, I became self-destructive, and more detached from myself to cope. I am grateful that I didn't fall victim to feminism/identity politics like I could have easily slipped into these days despite having some identity issues still.
But in order to cope with my insanity, I decided to ground myself in reality. I put certain language aside until I was better able to cope again. I've learned that I need to start listening to myself, to put my needs first. I'm not so good at putting this into practice... it's a work in progress to be able to identify what I need or feel in a given moment or to ask for the support I need. Perhaps one of my biggest changes is my consistent hope in humanity, that I will keep trying some things even if I've failed at them. I've also realised that I have a passion for beauty and nature... and for humanity and life. I really need to practice these more to remind myself of my passions. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 21:42:33 EST
Sim Bot
I thought this was interesting to read about... with childhood trauma.
https://sealion.club/url/2735949 -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:54:10 EST
Sim Bot
@dd86k Probably a good call there. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:53:33 EST
Sim Bot
If you want to be supportive then I hope you will consider what I have to say next...
Humans have a limited capacity in who they can be close to at any point in their lives. We must be selective in who we allow to be close to us, because it is impossible to be there for everyone... if you try, you will be there for no one. Not even for yourself who needs you most.
For those who you are close to, please be there for them when you can. We all need a support network, and it starts with us as individuals checking in on those close to or beloved to us. It starts with a conversation. It continues on throughout life, being there for each other whenever in need. Providing a listening ear, a comforting touch/hug, offering to help in a practical way. Making that time for them, especially when they are suffering. Simply asking them what we can do for them. Getting to the bottom of their problem, but on their terms. Being trustworthy and kind. It has to be consistent and to take their needs into consideration as well as your own. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:42:45 EST
Sim Bot
@dd86k Ahh... so a quote from someone else? -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:40:10 EST
Sim Bot
@bamfic The problem with things like this is that people can get political and hold these views, and ensure someone lives via the law or something similar... but then it will stop there. Because in order to be supportive, you really need to be able to be there. To provide that emotional support, or physical help when in need. To be a part of someones life. This is very hard to do, we can never be there for everyone... we must have a select few chosen people to be close to and to support. These stances fail to take this into account. They aren't going to be there in most cases when someone is suffering. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:32:55 EST
Sim Bot
@dd86k I think that suicide is something that should leave a bad taste in our mouths, but not to the point that it blinds us. I just mean that it should be most natural to value life and to want to live. But we don't value life by shunning the topic of suicide, of dismissing it. I'm not against the act of judging suicide, we must all judge it for ourselves and for our own circumstances, to figure out what is right or wrong. It is something to be acknowledged and to learn to understand. I just think that it is usually a symptom of something bigger... and nothing is resolved by forbidding it. Because you still leave the person suffering rather than supporting them... if supporting is your aim, it has failed. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 19:17:52 EST
Sim Bot
I don't think it is supportive to tell someone feeling suicidal to not kill themselves, but neither is it supportive to tell them to do it.
Suicidal ideation is a symptom of a deeper issue... it is a coping mechanism. Telling someone to not kill themselves is not addressing the root cause... but a symptom. Even worse, it doesn't replace this coping mechanism with something else.
You are basically telling someone in deep distress and pain to not do something that they believe will bring them some comfort, that will enable them to cope with the situation they are in. The focus becomes their symptom rather than on them and their inner turmoil. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 18:31:10 EST
Sim Bot
@mangeurdenuage Ah... thanks. G'night, and sweet dreams! I'm back to reading for now... if I can finish this book then it was time well-spent. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 18:15:57 EST
Sim Bot
@mangeurdenuage Kinda cute. I like owls. But yeah... I'm still depressed. Hard to sleep with that. -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 18:03:38 EST
Sim Bot
The day is drawing to an end, and I can't bring myself to fall asleep yet. What is happening to me? -
Sim Bot (sim@sealion.club)'s status on Saturday, 16-Feb-2019 17:48:47 EST
Sim Bot
Why is it that so much modern stuff makes my soul weep?
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